Mom Moment:(

Some days as a Mom you are just really tired...not necessarily for any reason (well maybe because your 4 year old crawled into bed with you and suctioned herself to you like a leech making it slightly difficult to sleep:).

I just got done taking a shower...TWICE. I started to get out the first time and realized I'd forgotten to wash my hair...oops...back in I went:)

Our Angel...

WE LOVE AND MISS YOU EVERY DAY GRANDPA ROWE! Thank you for watching over us...we can feel your love pouring down from heaven!

A conversation with Isabella

Princesses...it's a reoccuring theme in our world:) Princesses seem to permeate every part of our being and existence with two little ladies in the house. We love the Disney Princess movies and the lessons they can teach us...and Isabella seems to have taken quite an interest in the whole prince/princess/true love dynamic.

This has brought about lots of questions regarding getting married, her one true love, etc...these are actually fun questions...I enjoy them:) So one day Isabella says to me, "Mommy, will you and Daddy bring my boy to me? My one true love?" (she seems really into the idea of Bry and I picking her husband...we'll roll with that for now:). "Sure, we definitely will", I say.

Than she says, "Will you make sure he's handsome and has good hair like my Daddy?".

LOVE IT! Ah that kid, she needs her own hour long variety show:)

A conversation with Veronica

This conversation occured on Wednesday, January 28th, one day before our dear Grandpa Rowe passed away.

Bryan had meetings in MSP that whole week which also enabled him to visit Grandpa - what a blessing. For whatever reason, Veronica seemed to be missing Daddy more than normal that week and asked quite often where Daddy was. I kept telling her that Daddy was in Minneapolis visiting Grandpa Rowe.

So Wednesday morning, Veronica did her normal routine...she went to dance class and than went to sit down next to Debbie to eat her snack while Mommy taught the next class. Debbie said V was quiet for quite some time munching away on her crackers. Than she looked up at Debbie with her big brown eyes and said quite seriously, "My Daddy in 'eapolis visit my gpa...he sick".

Debbie said it was quite adorable...I can about imagine:)

My Dear Isabella...where do I begin to describe how special you are???

Isabella...this week has been tough on Daddy and I...we've said it before, but this week for whatever reason, it has really hit home that you are now our little lady. There is no turning back, you are growing up...too fast. Daddy was watching you at one point this week, you weren't doing anything in particular, and his eyes just welled up with tears. It's apparent in everything - your vocabulary and the words you choose to use, the way you interact with your friends and the conversations you have, dance and gymnastics - your skills are ever growing and it's obvious that you are growing into those long lanky legs, your mannerisms - the way you toss your hair behind your shoulder...every little thing...oh Isabella, you're starting to spread your wings and all too soon, you will be ready to fly.

You fascinate me. I find you to be one of the most fascinating beings that has ever lived. I have these feelings or visions of your future path being something really out of the norm. I have this vision of you having some sort of unique gift/skill - like being the best clarinet player in the world or being really good at numbers like Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man and winning Daddy lots of money in Vegas. I don't know how to explain it, but I just have this feeling about something inside of you that has yet to reveal itself to us.

You and I really connect in three areas these days - performing, serving others, and faith. You are a performer, you always have been. You sing, act, and dance with such passion and enthusiasm that it scares me sometimes. I fear the day you are 8 and ask us to move you across the country to pursue your dream of being a child star...I don't know that I could do that one my star, I love you too much.
Wanting to serve others and give to others, whether it is food, money, toys, etc...is second nature to you. It's not something anymore that is prompted. You regularly bring up helping people who don't have food, getting toys for kids who don't have any, etc...This week, your Auntie Steffie sent you some Valentine money. The first thing you said was, "Hey maybe I could use this to get toys for kids who need them". Thank you Isabella. Mommy is pretty hard on herself and worries about all the things that she is doing wrong...a moment like that helps me to feel like I must be doing at least one thing right. You decided to use your money to get Dimitri a toy during his stay in the hospital for pneumonia. You picked out a Glow Worm that sings because you remembered Timmy having one at his house...you are precious.

Your faith inspires me. I am moved beyond words at how by the age of 4 1/2 you have a relationship with God that I did not have until I was an adult. Now, I know there are no guarantees...you will probably go through times in your life where you struggle with your faith and have questions, but I really hope that this foundation you seem to have already will be the rock on which you build your life. I wish Dad and I could take full responsibilty for nurturing your relationship with God. We can take some of the credit, I suppose:) We've always prayed with you and we did a good job of picking an incredible faith community to be a part of in Calvary Lutheran (what an amazing church we belong too...come to Calvary everyone:). But your time at Riverside and Mrs. Voeller's gentle guidance has definitely encouraged your relationship with God, and Mom and Dad's too. I think we all finally got that idea that faith and God isn't just for Sunday, it's for every day, every moment...and we are so much happier, joyful, and filled with peace because of that. You trust fully in God for everything and in all of life's circumstances- the cut on your foot..."God will heal it", Grandpa Rowe passing away..."Don't worry Dad, he's with God and we'll see him again". You understand's God's mercy and forgiveness and his gift to us through the resurrection of his son in a way that baffles me. Today when we were listening to KLOVE, the announcer took call from a lady who was crying and really in need of prayer and encouragement. I debated turning it down, but left the volume where it was. JD Chandler started to pray for this woman and as he finished you quietly said, "That was so nice of that man to pray to God for that lady". You get so much Isabella...I'm blown away by your comprehension of the big picture and the things that really matter.

Hands down, my favorite time with you is when we pray together. I remember when you were a baby, Daddy predicted that you would either be a pastor or a ballerina. There are times when I listen to you pray that I wonder if I am up for being the mother of a pastor:) You have a gift and I'm just interested to see where your life's journey leads you. Will this trust you have in God be tested? Will you turn from your faith at some point (as it seems we all have)? Will you be responsible for leading others to God's loving arms? I'm very intrigued...partly because I remember having strong 'religious' feelings at a young age. Ask Grandma Grace and Papa Strom - they'll tell you about the morning they woke up to find that I had used a whole loaf of bread and pitcher of kool-aid to serve communion to my stuffed animals and dolls:) Or just ask me someday about the time I was pretty sure I met God at our rummage sale when I was 9 (I still think it might have been him:).

Having these bonds with you right now is really special...it is precious to me. I clasp these memories tightly in my hand and put them in the part of my heart that is just for you my dear daughter. You are a treasure my child and I am so touched that out of all the people in this world, God gave me the gift of being your mother. I pray that I do right by you.

So just know my beautiful brown eyed girl, that when you are ready, Daddy and I will let you go and watch you take flight. And if that flight leads you to your princess castle right next door to our house with Mommy giving you and your husband rides to Target because you're so sure you'll never be able to drive yourself, that's fine by me:)

I love you Isabella Grace Elizabeth and I ALWAYS WILL...ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS...just as our heavenly Father always loves us and never gives up on us...you can always depend on the same from Daddy and I. You're sleeping next to me as I type this...you are breathtakingly beautiful. I wish I could appreciate my life and it's blessings all the time as much as I do now watching you snuggled up in blankie resting peacefully...Thank you God...you have been so good to me!

Answers to some questions:)

What happened to the bunkbeds???? In a previous post at the end of December, I mentioned that we were getting bunk beds and the girls were moving into the same room. In my last post about V, I mentioned that she is still in a crib. I got several questions about this, so I'll answer for the masses that may be wondering:)

So we got the bunkbeds, but they couldn't be delivered until Jan 2. We got home from a holiday visit to MSP and took Isabella to pick out paint for the new room. We took the samples home to match to the bedding, Isabella picked a purple/pink color and I headed to Menards to get the paint while Bry and Isabella started to take stuff out of her room. I arrived home with the paint to find Bry and Isabella in bed, Isabella sobbing her eyes out about wanting her old room back, just an absolute wreck. Long story short, we did paint the room, but ultimately ended up cancelling the bunk bed order and keeping things as is. Isabella was an absolute basket case when it came to the reality of changing her room, I'm talking heartfelt, body shaking, traumatized sobs. We waited til the last minute to cancel the order, talking things over...but the decision was final when she walked up to me bawling her eyes out with a picture of her old room.

She sometimes still asks about scraping the pink/purple paint off the walls so she can have her blue/green walls back. But she also sometimes says, "I should've kept the bunk beds so Veronica could be in room". She is decidedly undecided:) We'll see what happens, I'm not ruling out the possibility of htem sharing a room at some point.

I had to laugh at the many questions wondering if we were going to have another child since the girls were going to share a room:) I guess we've never publicly come out and said, "We're done":) We've said it to some people, but not everyone:) How does one come to this decision???

Well, way back in the summer of 2007 when Isabella was 3 and Veronica almost 1, we were driving somewhere in the minivan and I looked back and saw the girls sitting in their carseats and there it was - my family, it was complete, I just knew..it was crystal clear, plain as day, obvious. I told Bry about it and we both agreed that we were very happy. And that was that...now don't get me wrong, I can also tell you a million other reasons we are done, but they were reasons/questions/issues I actually pondered after my 'minivan moment':) Everything from finances, dreams/ambitions/plans for the girls, my age (I like being a young mom), and my vision of the kind of Mom I want to be (I can do it with 2 kids and enjoy it, throw a 3rd one into the mix and I could do it, but I might be a stressed out crazy mess...I don't know if I am blessed with the organizational capacity to have 3 kids...heck, I don't even know if Iam blessed with the organizational capacity to have 2...ha ha:).

I do also have to say, that we are done by our personal choosing, but trust fully in God's plan for us and any surprises that would come our way:)

I also must say that I feel like I have three sons in Africa (Marvin, David, and Jerome) who I wonder about every day - did their transition back to life in Africa go well, are they getting enough food, do they feel loved and safe, do they know they will always be a part of our hearts and family? I miss those boys more than I can say.

And I also have to say how much I enjoy being an 'aunt' as of late with the addition of Jackson and Piper to our lives and of course with Kaitlyn, and the Wadholm kids, and the Mc-Fadz twins...something so special about being an aunt...I LOVE IT!!! And I love how within our life, family reaches beyond blood/biological ties.

Sharing a room was something that was totally and completely Isabella's idea. She asked us about it consistently for 3 months. During the 3rd month we started talking with her about it further, telling her what it would be like, etc...and oh yes, she wanted to share a room with her little sisty so bad:) Oh well:)

So hopefully I covered everything and answered any questions that were on wondering minds:) Our girls, we love them soooooooooooooooo much!!!! We are truly blessed!

Veronica Victories:)

Time to check in on our littliest munchkin:) Here are some notes on our sassy little Miss V:
*Veronica began jumping on one foot in the last month (age 2 years 4 months)

*Veronica is very into counting and in the past week I have heard the following..."1, 4, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13":)

*Veronica's vocab and conversation skills continue to grow...her cutest word as of late, 'actually'..."Mommy, that actually mine, it not Bella's":)

*Veronica really enjoys doing her little wood board puzzles right now

*Funny...Veronica pronounces Care Bear as 'Care Dare Bear'

*Prayer...Veronica is a 'precious prayerer':) She takes great pride in contributing to meal prayer time and our morning prayers in th car. Whenever she prays, she folds her hands, bows her head, closes her eyes, whispers something very quietly and we know she is done when she opens her eyes and says loudly, "Amen":) During her prayers in the car I can usually catch her repeating one or two things over and over, "My Gpa Rowe, my Gpa Rowe, I pray my Gpa Rowe"...it's cute and touching to hear her echo the prayers she hears from the rest of us.

Veronica continues to strike a perfect balance of growing up, but retaining an extremely baby like quality...as she is our last little baby, there is something very nice about her having this baby quality. But there is no denying she is growing up:) She is still a tiny little peanut, but we hae noticed in the past two months that she has been stretching out.

Veronica talks very LOUDLY...it's been suggested I can train her to use a quiet voice...I just don't know if it's within our girls to have a quiet voice:) Ha ha:) She seems very much the second child, wanting her voice to be heard over the big sister and running herself into exhaustion doing everything she can to keep up with the big kids:)

Veronica remains in her crib and we still feel she is nowhere near ready for a big girl bed or even a toddler bed. Potty training isn't being rushed or pushed right now. I guess I could push it, but it's not a battle worth fighting right now...come summertime when she's closer to 3, than it's a battle to take up. She does express interest here and there, mainly if we are in a group of our many little friends and she sees several of the older kids go to the potty..."I gotta go potty Mom" and she'll just take off, strutting confidently after the older kids heading to the bathroom:) We are letting Veronica be Veronica and not pushing for her to do things in the manner of her older sister.

Veronica continues to adore dance, gymnastics, and performing in general...she and her big sis are definitely two peas in a pod in that respect. They'll be ready to hit the road any day now:) It is fascinating to watch her understanding of the technical aspects/vocabulary/etc...of her activities, mainly due to the fact that she first watched her big sis do these activities before doing them herself.

Veronica continues to charm the pants off of everyone she meets...the giggle, the eyes, the cheeks...most everyone she meets is putty in her hands:)